Tuesday, January 31, 2006

QUITTING AND LEAVING

I just wrote my resignation letter a few moments ago. No, I am not quitting because I cannot work under pressure. I'm doing so because I realise that I'm completely occupied with work and missing out on what used to be important to me. What happened to the clubbing trips with the Bitches? What happened to the sleepover at Hajar's? What happened to soccer-mania? What happened to the promise I made to Josco about going back to SJSM? Judo; what on earth has happened to my techniques?!!

This is the time for me to sit back and bum around, which is why I signed up as a part-time
waitress and not a full-time one! But somehow, Joe has been making me work at least five days a week. Sometimes even more. I am only entitled to have one day off out of seven?!

THIS IS ATROCIOUS!

For my schedule this week, I listed down that I couldn't work on Monday (today) and on Saturday because of family gatherings. C'mon, you people should understand; it's the Lunar New Year! But Joe actually came up to me and said, "Kim, you can choose either Monday or Saturday as your off-day. So which will it be?"

Eh?!!

Am I on drugs or did my manager just question me about my schedule? That's what working PART-TIME is all about, isn't it? I have the right to choose when to work! But what's with the "you-only-have-one-day-off" shit?! Then I might as well work FULL-TIME right (and I don't intend to)?

I am not about to let work take up my youth. Once I get my pay for February, it's bye-bye Billy Bombers. It's been two months since the 'O's ended and what have I been doing? Slogging my guts out!

To the staff at Bugis, none of this is aimed at any of you. While working back there, I did feel like a part-timer. Mag gave me AT LEAST three days' off, which is why I absolutely can't stand Joe's way of handling things. Why is he monitoring my attendence when it is written in black and white that I AM ONLY WORKING PART-TIME?!

Enough is enough. Come 15th February, I'm giving my uniform back, taking my pay and walking far, far away from Marina Square. Jasmine, Ashley, Ruyan, Adeline, Garry, Louis, Dhanny, Cecilia and Claudia, you will all be in my prayers. Thank you for everything.


Letter to *Mushroom (kay-pohs, this is not an entry for attention):

I've been thinking about it and my answer is no. As much as I do not wish to be tied down by work, I do not want to be tied down by a relationship, which I know for a fact, would not last. I'm gonna be 18 this year. I want to enjoy every single moment of it because I'm never gonna be 18 again.

I wanna go crazy with my Bitch. I wanna hang out with The Boobies. I wanna resume Judo trainings with Sharky at NYP. I wanna roam the town with Kathy and Kelly. And while I'm doing all of those, I don't want to deal with phone-calls from you asking about my whereabouts or what I'm doing at the moment or what time I'll be home etc.

You're a nice guy. You will find a better girl, someone who's willing to sacrifice time for you, make time for you and spend time with you. I'm not that girl, I'm not anyone's girl.

This isn't LOVE, this is lust and infatuation. This is one of the two reasons why I can't accept you. The second would be because I'm commitment-phobic. Clara knows this. Jen knows this. Amal, Hajar and Fir should know this as well.



Fact #1 about Cancerians: They are Commitment-phobic!

You'll never hear a Cancerian talk about stuff like, "What do you think OUR future will be?", or "When do you think WE'LL get married?", or simply talk about anything that concerns a 'us' on a long-term basis, or a 'future', which is, admittedly, rather unpredictable. Unless, that is, you guys are ALREADY seriously considering marriage.

Otherwise, Cancerians will never broach the topic, unless forced to. To them, there are no 'what-ifs'; they hate to think about what-ifs. Everyday is a new day, and they will just live the day as it comes. Of course, they will have their plans for their futures. But, these plans usually are a guide to themselves, like "When will I want to get married?", or "Where my career be in 10 years?", or "What will my future home be like?". What-ifs are totally senseless (to them).

They hardly will make the long-term plans with a special one specifically in mind, and this especially applies to guys. They dare not approach the topic, even during casual chats, because they are afraid their girls will hold them to their words. On their part, they think that they are merely being careful, so that in the future, they will not have to be held responsible for what they had said during casual chats. I mean, how often do you mean the things that you said on serious topics during casual chats? Even if you did mean them back then, chances are that the current circumstances are not the same, and your views have changed.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------


You see???

I'm a lousy lover/partner/girlfriend/boo or whatever you wanna call it. Think it's not a good enough excuse? Here's another:


Fact #2: Cancerians love themselves. Alot.

It is very rare, they will love someone else (who is not from their families) more than himself. He will not change for anyone's sake, regardless how good your reasons might be. To him, a relationship is a bonus to his life, and not something that is PART of his life. You will always be the additional little circle attached to his original circle; very rarely will a Cancerian allow the additional little circle to be integrated into his original circle.

Unless, of course, if you marry him/her. Then you'll be part of his/her family, thus becoming part of his initial circle.Cancerians, like I've said, will rarely change himself for the sake of anyone's. Take it, or leave it. What you see is what you get. But he will change, if nagged at, albeit grudgingly. And of course, your reasons would have to be super valid in order to budge him. Also, he would change if it really really made you unhappy, but he wouldn't be happy after changing either. In fact, whenever given the chance, it'll be back to square one again. Vicious cycle.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I don't wanna see you get hurt emotionally. I'm afraid I won't be going out for a movie with you anytime soon either. Please understand; a relationship is not a must-have to me. Even if I do agree to be with you now, I'll dump you the moment my semester at NYP starts. There's more to my life than just flowers, sweet words and mush.

I live for myself, my family, my friends and my sports (Judo, EPL, Serie A, La Liga). You haven't seen the real me. You have yet to witness me go berserk, yell at others over the slightest issue, scream profanities like there was no tomorrow and being a complete bum.

I repeat, it's not love that you're experiencing. It's lust. All that your eyes have come in contact with is a face with foundation powder, eye-liner, mascara, blush and lip-gloss. Even if it is love, you're just loving me for what I am; not who I am.

Sorry, but it's not gonna work out. It'll never work out. I guess my resignation will do both of us good. That way, you won't be distracted and I won't have to feel the guilt of rejecting you. Thank you for the late night calls and sweet sms-es. You were a wonderful friend to have.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

PINK PUSSYCAT: A Girly Drink

Who has actually dined at Billy Bombers, please raise your hands. Not many eh? Well, we do have drinks called Pink Pussycat and Green Grasshopper; both are flavoured sodas which Clara and Faris have tried before.

So I had to work last night and oh my goodness gracious.... Joe made me run Section C and the alfresco ALONE! I was actually teamed up with Louis but since there were so many customers ordering drinks and milkshakes, he couldn't possibly help me cos Joe appointed him as the barista for the night.

Two Caucasian gentlemen (clad in business suits) were sitting in my section and one of them ordered a Pink Pussycat. He asked me, "What do you think about that?" and I told him that normally, it's the ladies who order that drink. Hahaha! He looked at me and said something like, "Ok then, I'll go with a Green Grasshopper. I don't want any girly drink."

Once his soda was prepared, I took it to his table, placed it in front of him and reminded him that he didn't order a "girly drink". His partner cracked up; laughing at the top of his lungs. Nice people, really generous customers as well!

THEY FRICKIN' LEFT ME A $10 TIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ten dollars leh! OMG! $10!!!11!!!1! But I didn't get to keep it. BAH! The cash is gonna go to the company. (I am trying my hardest to hold back my tears. 10 bucks!!!!!)

Enough of that already.

There was another group of American Chinese kids sitted in the alfresco and duh, I had to take their orders and serve them. Not that I hate doing such stuff; I'm a waitress afterall. But it was a huge group man. We're talking about.... 11 teenage kids!!

While keying their orders into the computer, I lost track of the number of set meals I had already keyed in and I panicked right on the spot. I went psycho! Thank God for Garry. Seriously!! He's a supervisor despite being only one year my senior. Pro eh? If he wasn't around at that time, Joe would have given me an earful.

We got things figured out and those orders were sent out within 5 minutes. Whew!

After those kids were done with their meals, they all walked past me and personally thanked me for my service! WOW!! I was so overwhelmed. A huge tip followed by gratitude!!! Amazing.

Punched out only at 11.30pm. Went home with a *mushroom. Wahahaha!

Monday, January 23, 2006

This isn't going right

Reunion dinner was so-so. Eunice is pregnant with a boy whose name is gonna be Euan (pronounced as Ewan but spelled the scottish way). Oh boy, another nephew! Another one that's gonna call me "Aunty".

I'm 17 and beginning to feel old.

Janice's fiance is so.... quiet as compared to her previous beau. Sit beside him also never talk to me one. BE A MAN, DUDE! I'm your future cousin-in-law! TALK TO ME!!!!!! I bet he was feeling intimidated by my appearance; good boys do not talk to ah-lians right? The twins daren't even look my way this year. Fwahahaha! They're afraid, oh yes they're afraid of me.

All my older cousins who were present at the restaurant earlier on were either married or engaged. This makes me the oldest one around who's not yet walked down the aisle, followed by the twins, Jade and lastly, the twins' 10 year old younger sister.

Omigoodness.













*** It didn't work out. But our friendship will still remain. Promise. ***

Just feel like it

I have tonnes to update about. But I'm not sure I've the patience to sit on this bloody chair for over an hour because I gotta get ready for my reunion dinner TONIGHT!

Chinese New Year has yet to arrive, yadda yadda yadda.... WHATEVER! That's what I like about my family (who plans stuff ahead). We always have our reunion dinner a week in advance to avoid the crowd.

Let's talk about Thursday. Martin was kind enough to take me to the hairdresser's at Woodlands. Clara came soon after and THAT BITCH TOOK OVER AN HOUR TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHICH COLOUR SUITED HER HAIR BEST!!!!!

She arrived while Sam (the hairdresser) was half-way through with my head of wild curls and even after my hair was done, and I returned from the ATM machine, she was still sitting on the chair going, "OMG! Kim, your hair is so blonde! Eh, what colour should I choose?! I dunno! OMG!"

People, don't be misled by Clara's comment. My hair isn't blonde, it's brown.

My fringe is.

Went back to work at Marina on Friday and it was the first time we experienced a full-house!! WOOT! Earned over 2K, but it's nothing compared to the 6K-9K that Bugis usually receive from customers. We're off to a pretty good start, I must say. And the crew are beginning to really bond with each other now.

Impressed Joe = Happy crew

SATURDAY! Joe sent me back to Bugis to help out because there wasn't enough staff around. Mag saw my hair and exclaimed a very loud, "WAH KAO!!!!"


Here are some of the other comments which I can recall:

-Uncle Lim, "Wah... ni de tou fa zhe me bian cheng zhe yang?" (wah... what happened to your hair?)

-Lemon, " Eh, ni qu ran tou fa ah?" (eh, you dye your hair ah?)

-Ben, "Aiyoh! Why dye until like that?"

-Nicky, "Woah sey!! Stylo man!"

-Gen, "OMG! What the fuck! I was asking myself who is that with the gold hair! So it's you! Come here let me see!"

-Mindy, "Eeyer... Very ah-lian leh."

-Anthony, "CHAO AH LIAN!!!!!"

-Kathy, "OI! Why you colour your hair until like that?!! Like ku-ku leh!"

-Kelly, "Aiyoh... why this colour huh?"

-Kok Sin, " WAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

-Ping, "Eh, your hair ah.... haiyoh"

-Theresa, "Oh my gawd!!!!! YOU DYED YOUR HAIR TIL' IT BECAME LIKE THAT?!"

-Aunty Mary, " You very stress at Marina is it? Stress until your hair become this colour."

Tsk tsk... only Nicky gave a positive remark. The rest of you all hor.... humph! Especially that Gen ah! Keep on saying things like, " Wah lao eh! You are more ah-lian than ah-lian, you know? Super ah-lian can? CHAO AH-LIAN!"

What ah-lian?! How did that term come about anyway?! My parents didn't really say anything. Hahahaha! My mum just started laughing (straight in my face) and my dad merely said some thing like, "Haiyoh... you look like a dog lah."

Last year say I look like lion... this year say look like dog. Next time I dye pink to look like a flamingo ok? -it's the year of the dog btw-

Let's see what my grandma has to say in a few hours' time.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

On the verge of giving up!

PLEASE SEND ME BACK TO BUGIS. I HATE MARINA SQUARE. I HATE CITYLINK. I HATE THE FACT THAT NOBODY COMES TO THE NEW OUTLET. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU AS WELL. I HATE HATE HATE EVERYTHING COS THINGS ARE JUST HATE-ABLE.

LONG LIVE BUGIS JUNCTION! NO OTHER OUTLET CAN EVER BEAT IT. NO OUTLET CAN EARN MORE THAN IT. ALSO, NO OTHER OUTLET HAS WORKERS WHO'RE AS OPEN-MINDED AND CHEERFUL.

MAG
STEPH
JASMINE
KATHY
SERENE
MINDY
GEN
KRIS
SHERLYN
CAROL
THERESA
NICKY
BANI
CECILIA
YOUNG
PAUL
KELLY
CLAUDIA
SHAO WEN
EUGENE
KOK SIN
AH-PING
UNCLE LIM
MARCUS
ANTHONY
BEN

EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU WILL BE IN MY HEART, EVEN AFTER I QUIT BILLY BOMBERS. YOU'VE MADE LIFE SO MUCH MORE ENJOYABLE AND I'VE NEVER BEEN SO EAGER TO GO TO WORK BEFORE. BUT NOW THAT I'M NO LONGER WORKING WITH YOU GUYS, LIFE SEEMS TO BE MEANINGLESS AND I'VE NEVER BEEN SO EAGER TO GIVE UP.

I'LL KEEP ALL OF YOU IN PRAYER AND HOPEFULLY JOE WILL ONE DAY TAK BOLEH TAHAN ME AND TRANSFER ME BACK. I'LL BE KEEPING MY FINGERS CROSSED.

THERESA AND NICKY, I MISS THE BOTH OF YOU THE MOST! IN MY EYES, TWO OF YOU ARE THE BEST WAITRESSES EVER!

KATHY AND KELLY, MY LOVELY JIE MEI! I CAN BARELY WAIT TO WORK WITH THE BOTH OF YOU AGAIN!

OMG... I'LL STOP HERE. OVER AND OUT!

Monday, January 16, 2006

LET'S JUST SAY THAT I'M HOME-SICK!

Honestly speaking, I do not like my new working environment. Maybe because it's still new and I'm always the one packing goods by the load into the booth seats (I'm a girl, mind you!). Or could it be because the way Joe manages this outlet is totally different from Mag? I don't know, and I don't wanna find out. The bottom line is, I WANT TO GO BACK TO BUGIS!

Marina is totally different from Bugis. At Bugis, we use carbon-copies to take orders. Afterwhich, we walk to the Runner's station and yell, "Kitchen, Bar! New order!" and those in the kitchen and bar would acknowledge us by saying, "Cheers!".

Over at Marina, we use palm-tops to record down customers' orders (don't gimme that shit about palm-tops being better than paper. IT IS NOT!). Also, Jo has given strict instructions that there will not be any "Cheers!" in his outlet. Not forgetting, when customers ask for the bill, we are not allowed to shout which table wants their bill to the cashier. We have to walk over to the counter and get it ourselves.

All of a sudden, I don't feel like I'm working in Billy Bombers. There's a lack of enthusiasm in the new workplace. The staff aren't that close to each other because they were all hand-picked from different outlets to come and work here.

Whenever there aren't any customers around, you can see (very clearly) that there are different cliques within the restaurant. Those who were from Century Square will be talking to each other at one corner, those from Bugis Junction at another corner, Heeren staff at another corner and yadda yadda yadda.

I can still remember how the staff of the BJ outlet would gather beside Table 23 and complain about aching legs, fussy customers, dirtied uniforms etc. I didn't really treasure those moments but I REALLY DO WANT TO TURN BACK THE CLOCK NOW. We're not allowed to talk to each other at Marina. The moment Cecilia, Claudia, Amelia and I come together during working hours, we're "spoiling the image of Bugis Junction".

On Friday the 13th, Jo told me that I was needed at BJ bacause a few of it's staff were on MC. So I went back and I had the time of my life! The moment the kitchen crew saw me, they were like, "EH!! You come back liao ah? Marina nice or not?" Those guys were having their lunch break at that time and I had so much fun chatting up with them all. I've never felt so at home before.

What's so unlucky about Friday the 13th? I was having the time of my life using carbon-copies to list down orders and passing them to Bani, who was runner for that day. The only "unlucky" happening was when one of the customers signalled me to go over to her table and I walked over, only to find out that she was my Chinese teacher. -_-"

What other bad thing happened huh? Erm... oh yah! One asshole (service crew) pissed me off real bad. Both of us went into the dishwashing area (she was in front of me) and she just fucking stood there like she owned the damn place. I said very loudly, "Excuse me" but she continued blocking my way. Was it because she doesn't understand English, or could it be that she only understood Malaysian accented English?

Oh, I forgot to add in that I was holding two empty chilli bottles, wanting to throw 'em away. All of a sudden, she swinged her arm and voila! There were chilli stains on her right sleeve. I already asked her to let me pass through, she just stood there. She knew very well that I was going to dumped those empty bottles, she still swing her arm. Her sleeve kena chilli sauce, she had the cheek to say, "Oi! This shirt not you wash one also don't need to dirty it right! What the fuck lah you!"

WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK!

Everytime only know how to scold, "WHAT THE FUCK!". If you wanna use the "F" word on me, jus say it, "FUCK!". Don't need to waste that few moles of O2 saying WHAT THE FUCK. Damn yeast infected cow! The ONLY reason I'm glad I'm being transferred to Marina is because I DO NOT HAVE TO SEE YOU EVER AGAIN!

Ok, anger being frustrated.

Other than my face-off with *****, it was the reunion of the 3 sisters; Kathy, Kim & Kelly (Huiling). WAHAHAHA! Eugene was being bullied by me the whole time and I always used the excuse that he can't touch me because 1) the law is unfair and 2) my sisters were around. He would then put on this ah-beng expression and say, "Bu yao yi wei ni de jie mei zai wo jiu pa ok! Wo bu hao qi fu de hor!" (don't think your sisters here can scare me ok! I'm not a wimp!).

Not scared eh? After cleaning up the place, I (literally) jumped on him and forced him to piggy-back me from the store-room to the toilet area. Haha! Elder sis (Kathy) took a video of it all.

Oh man, I can't go on anymore. The more I talk about my old colleagues, the more home-sick I become. Work at 5pm, dammit! Let's just pray that I won't be the one being made to pack goods.

Friday, January 13, 2006

"Time Management"

IT WAS A VISION THAT CAME FROM GOD TO ME!! I'm serious! I saw it while sweeping the floor of the new Billy Bombers outlet at Marina Square.

Okok, I saw myself as a bartender; adding ingredients into metal canisters and swinging them around to produce some kinda shit drink. And I had long hair -omg- I can't believe I saw myself with LONG HAIR! The one promise I've made to myself and have yet to break, is to constantly snip my hair short to avoid looking like a horse.

So anyway, this "vision" has made me realised something.

LIFE IS FUCKING SHORT!!!!!

Right now, I am gonna make a list of goals that I must accomplish before I reach a certain age. Those reading, DO NOT, at any point of time, laugh! You wanna giggle/chuckle/smirk/snigger, you bloody go ask yourself if you've the guts to let others know what you plan to do in life.


Before I reach adulthood (21 yrs):

- know the BB menu by heart
- able to make milkshakes without referring to lists
- make history in BB (already done it, thanks to "coconut coke")
- get Diploma in either Nursing (paediatric) or Pharmaceutical Science
- learn to appreciate alcohol... and being able to stay sobber!
- get my black belt!!!!!!


Early to mid-twenties:

- sign up with SIA and travel the world
- visit Anfield at least ONCE and watch a match LIVE!
- get some bartending tips
- BE A BARTENDER!!


Late twenties:

- Quit SIA and return to the world of science
- Start work at a local hospital (abt 1 year)
- Get a Degree in Nursing (Griffith University, Australia)
- Offered a job in a hospital overseas


Thirties (the big three-zero!):

- err... ok, this is damn hard. To be continued!

Thursday, January 12, 2006

It's farewell, for now

As many of you know, today (actually yesterday) was my last day working with the crew from Bugis Junction. I had my first split shift since I became a BB girl.

Punched in at around 11.45am (15 minutes before my actual time!) and helped Steph wipe the framed pictures, window panes and walls. I was arranging the tables and chairs at Section A when my elbow accidentally hit a chilli sauce and ketchup bottle off table 5.

*piang!!!!*

Bloody ketchup bottle smashed into smithereens... chilli bottle was unharmed (miraculously).

Had lunch at 3pm with Steph, Carol and the kitchen crew. Man, I was feeling so at home with those people during my break. Talked lotsa cock with Kris as well! I was begging her to train me in the bar section (ie. making milkshakes, malts, flavoured sodas, sundaes) but she told me that there wasn't enough people on the floor so she wouldn't be able to train me.

SHE WAS WRONG!

While I was washing the milkshake glasses, Steph agreed to train me in the bar! Woohoo! Another miracle! Prepared the canisters, desserts, cherries, flavourings blah blah blah and before I knew it, I WAS MAKING MY VERY FIRST MILKSHAKE! Chocolate shake!!

Was happily cleaning the the nozzle of the chocolate syrup bottle when one table called for their dessert.

FUCK! No more pre-made desserts left in the fridge. Reached out to grab four ice-cream cups when my (very wet) fingers slipped and I broke one of it.

*piang!!!*

Ohmigosh! had to sweep up the little glass bits and new orders kept coming in!!

Gen: Kitchen, Bar! New order!

Me: *stops sweeping* CHEERS!! *takes order list, leave it on table and continue sweeping*

Gen: Bar! Additional order!

Me: *stops sweeping yet again* Wah lao eh! Cheers! *takes order list and go on to wash hands*

Gen: Kitchen, Bar! New order!

Me: *washing hands*

Gen: Bar????

Mag: Er, Kim ah. Don't forget you're doing bar today hor.

Me: HUH?!

Gen: Bar! Where are you? New order!!!

Me: Oh, okok! CHEERS!!!


WHAT?! Don't laugh can? My first attempt leh! The only time I had help from someone was when either Steph or Gen came into the bar when they were free. Other than that, I was left all alone to pour the drinks, scoop the ice-cream, prepare the shakes/malts etc.

It was almost time for cleaning up when another table asked for their dessert. BLOODY HELL! I wipe everything shining shining liao then you ask for ice-cream... Argh!!!

Reached out to where the ice-cream cups were and took three of it when my (still very wet) fingers slipped......



BUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! This time, don't have *piang!!!*. How come? I managed to catch it while it was around 15cm from the ground (you know, like how Clark Kent usually stretches out his arm really quickly to grab hold of something? I DID THAT!). This was followed by me going, "Heng ah... heng ah... nearly ah! Lucky, lucky!"

Steph witnessed the entire incident and went, "Kim ah, from morning*piang piang*until now still not enough huh?"

WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I *piang!!!* also not purposely one... wah liew!

The entire day was really enjoyable. Making beverages and desserts were fun... but the cleaning up could kill! Wipe this, wipe that. Wash this, wash that. Clean here, clean there. Keep this, keep that. Remove this, remove that and so on and so forth.

I'M GONNA MISS YOU GUYS SO MUCH!!!!!

Theresa, Nicky, Mindy, Gen, Kris, Lemon, Carol, Bani, Sherlyn, Shao Wen, Serene, Steph, Mag, Kathy, Hwee Ling, Anthony, Uncle Lim and alot alot more lah. Hand pain from all that ice-cream scooping!!

Starting work at MS at 5pm later on today. Thank God no need to wear uniform. It's damn dirty with all that ice-cream and lemon tea stains. One of the stains (chocolate ice-cream, i think) conveniently happens to be in the middle of my breast pocket. Yes, it looks like a nipple. So you can imagine how many people where staring when I had supper at McDonalds.

Okies, I'm worn out right now. Ta-ta y'all! Theresa, I'll DEFINATELY find time to visit you; my sweet little friend from the Phillipines!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

GYSS Vs. EVSS

We've come down to this. Sister against sister, school against school. I find it fair... both institutions are relatively unknown to majority of the population here and... erm... ok fine, I'm just writing this cos I'm very bored and restless.

Round One: Famous Amos

Jade showed me the list of her subject teachers. One name caught my eye; Lincoln.

The moment I saw it, I exclaimed, "Woah sey! Got President one!!". This was followed by Jade saying, "Still have ah! One guy in my school has the name Kennedy".

Nice, nice! But nothing beats Singapore Lee (my future son). So what can I use to compare with these two famous names from Guangyang Secondary?

Oh, yes! I remember! East View has LEE WUNG YEW!

Huh?! You donch know who that is? WHAT KIND OF SINGAPOREAN ARE YOU?! Ever watched the SEA Games? He's the guy in the shooting events.

OMG! His PE lessons were killers man, I tell you! Thank God I've never failed the 2.4km run, otherwise, I'll be like the other not so fortunate souls who had to complete another 200 jumping jacks. I was beginning to like him a wee bit more when he transferred to Siglap Sec. to teach Faris English. BAH!

Not forgetting, I also have Mr Shaun Chew! He's my hot PE/Geography teacher. Also, he appeared to two advertisements; promoting some condominium and ABC beer. Wahahaha!

Anybody watched "Shooting Stars"? Remember Jack Toot, the guy that kissed Olinda; David Aw? Oh yeah, he's an ex-East Viewian (he looked so different back in 2001).

That's 3 against 2. Long live EVSS!!!


Round Two: The attack of the Red Hairs (ang mohs)

On orientation day, my dad accompanied my sis to school and he saw her Caucasian classmate. Dad told me that the boy was "quite handsome".

This is the boy I was refering to in my previous post! Jade told me lotsa stuff about him (and I didn't even have to ask). I KNEW SOMETHING WAS GOING ON BETWEEN THEM BOTH! You know, whenever a girl starts to talk non-stop about a guy, you can cross your heart and be prepared to see her bring bouquets of roses home on 14 Feb.

K.T. Portscher (say Porsher). Is born on **-**-1993. Lives at T****** V***. Was originally from J*** S*** primary. Has one older sister and one younger brother. Older sister studies at.... okok, I'm getting carried away.

That's the Guangyang hottie for you.

Who does East View have? Red-haired hunk... die lah...



ASHLEY!!!!!! Yes, yes, yes! Ashley Lee Williams (it's a guy btw). From Britain too. No offence to those who had little girl crushes on him, but he's not all that gorgeous.

One point to GY. Whatever.


Round Three: Size matters!

We have a bigger canteen!

EV 2-1 GY.


Round Four: Speak proper Engrish

For the 5 years the I've been in that &^$@^* school, a morning never went by without SOMEONE greeting the "stew-lents" and asking them to "gip (their) mouths" when he's talking.

I also heard from a teacher that he once sent an e-mail to all the staff; asking them to be "puncture" for the meeting. Of course, what he meant was "punctual". Tsktsk.

Jade says her school has someone like that as well. I don't know his/her name but SHE SAID THERE WAS THIS SUCH PERSON!

It's a tie. No win, no lose.


Round Five: Kay or Jay?

I think Kuanjie would have a headache trying to pick either Kay or Jay since his name is Kae-Jay (K.J.)

For those who still don't get it, which alphabet would you pick; K (kay) or J (jay)? So it's Kim or Jade?

KIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIM
KIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIM
KIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIM
KIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIM
KIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIMKIM

Me?!?!?! I won!!!!

Oh yeah, baybeh! EV 3-1 GY.


I am the Champion, my friend. And I'll keep on fighting til' the end. I am the champion, I am the champion, no time for losers (points at Jade) cause I am the champion.... OF THE WORLD!!!!

*huge applause follows and I start to shed crocodile tears*

Will it happen?

Why do I have the feeling that I'm gonna get a brother-in-law SOON? And an ang moh one as well.

Hmm... only the second week of school and I've spied mushy sms-es. Not bad, not bad!

I believe his name is.... err... let's just keep it a secret until it's CONFIRMED. A Caucasian boyfriend at the age of 13... nice job, Jade!

Sunday, January 08, 2006

The Bloody Fucker

YOU SON OF A DICK! You've got alot of nerve asking Clara to stop hanging out with me eh? Who do you think you are?!! Boyfriend, so?? Big fuck is it?! I'll show you what a "big fuck" is!

FUCK!!!!

There you have it. A BIG FUCK (and you're nothing like it.)

Clara went out with Faris and I for a movie. Cannot ah?! Our friendship has lasted almost a decade and it's gonna continue surviving. There's NOTHING you can do about it. Muahahaha! In 1997, the three of us were in the swim team. Then in 1998, we were classmates in 4G. My, that's 9 years of friendship... TRY AND BEAT THAT!

Lemme see, according to you, the main reason why you're afraid to let my Bitch hang out with me is because I always bring boys along.

What a tragic reason. A 21 year old feeling threatened by "boys"??? My gawd! I knew you couldn't handle my Bitch. Lost her to a Primary School mate once... afraid that it might happen AGAIN??

Too bad for you, I HOPE IT HAPPENS! She deserves so much more than a scumbag of a boyfriend. From this day forth, everytime she jio me out, I'm gonna bring a "boy" along so she can get to know him and eventually dump you for him. HA!

If you can't have her, no guys can? You really think you can hold on to her? Tell me, does Miss Liew look like some kinda nitwit to you? Do you think she's really that dumb to cling on to a "black fish" when there are thousands of "goldfishes" out in the open sea? Puleeeesssee! As if any woman would wanna go through life with a jack-ass like you.

I wanna intro her to my guys leh... how?! I want her to marry and get fucked by a drop dead gorgeous man, worthy of her time and love leh... How?! In her wedding album, the groom is gonna over 180cm and owns 10 condominium units (plus he allows me to use the facilities there) leh... HOw?!!

You are gonna try and kill him right? Yeah, precisely. You can only "try", cos you'll never succeed. Loooooooosssseeeerrrr!!!!!

*throws a 10 cent coin at you*

Getting jealous over a photograph. Wahahaha! I had no idea my photography skills were THAT great. What I saw was 2 childhood friends enjoying their time together. But it seems like you had another perspective of the shot I took.

You saw your girl running away with an ex-classmate/ex-swimming team-mate.

Dear Dickhead, you're not jealous. You're I-N-S-E-C-U-R-E. Why are you insecure? Cos you don't trust Clara. Why don't you trust her? Cos she's too much for you to handle. That's the way she is; unpredictable. I like it, and she's gonna remain that way. Don't you dare compare her with any random girl. You like comparing her with "better" girls, you fucking go date those whores.

The first time I heard about you, I was on the phone with her and you were pissing her off by using childish, underhand methods (ie. using the names of other females to provoke her). And then, now, you're telling her who to hang out with and who not to.

Go fondle sagging breasts and suck hairy nipples lah!

Just admit it, you've got no balls. NO BALLS! Even clay marbles would be too big a burden for you. All you have is a limp rod. Aaaaawwww.... don't cry... sayang sayang!!

You feel threatened by my presence. You're gonna lose your girlfriend to me. Fwahahaha! I'm gonna steal her away from right under your nose and have lesbian sex with her on a bar top on ladies' night. Heard that?!

I'm gonna eff her upside down and impregnate her. Somebody, stop me!

ps: Bitch, the lesbian sex part is only to scare him. We'll settle for something more... decent. How about hot and heavy make-out sessions with male hotties?

Thursday, January 05, 2006

A friendship that lasted




Oh yes, it's been 8 years since 1997. One thing's for sure, it's gonna continue.

ANSWERS

Slyvia.


Hitam.


Pink0.



Siti, you were REAL close. Yana, Hitam does belong to me.
Everyone, please excuse my dad's spastic expression. He had too many spastic pills that night.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

BEAUTIFUL TRIO!

Aren't they remarkable? Don't you LOVE them? Want to OWN them?



Uh-oh... they've got owners who love 'em too much to let them stay out of their (owner's) sight.


*Sylvia was purchased because SAF personnels weren't allowed to use phones with PDAs. How sad! A brand new O2 phone had to be traded in for a metallic grey Motorola V3.


It was near Christmas and a blue Nokia 6100 was traded in for the black version V3. *Hitam became part of the family just 2 days before the 25th of December.


The latest addition to the family of phones is *Pink0! Just two days old (actually just 2 days from being out of the box), she is much loved by someone in the Lee household. In fact, she's so loved, the owner couldn't bare to remove the plastic protection for fear that Pink0 might get scratched.
***********************************************************

Some of you may already know which phone is mine. But those of you who don't, GUESS! Haha! Ooh... I love suspense (but not when I'm feeling it). And while you're at it, why not try and figure out which phone belongs to who in the family?

Answers will be out shortly... with pictures of the owners with the phones!

Monday, January 02, 2006

How it went by...

It was new year's eve, and I was on night shift. Johan made me host for the night. But around 8pm, after shouting, "Hi! Good evening! Have a look at our festive set meals!" to passing shoppers for over two hours, I saw black!

Like, literally! I saw black and Jo asked Jasmine to get me something to eat. Got a bowl of clam chowder soup and some chunky fries. My very first time having food from Billy Bombers. Also my first time feeling like a wimp. I NEVER SEE BLACK!

Punched out around 10pm and walked to the Esplanade with Cecilia and Ziqi. I was feeling like a canned up sardine while standing beside the Esplanade; waiting for the fireworks to go off. It was a spectacular view, but the inconsiderate acts of certain people turned my mood a couple of notches down.

I FULLY SUPPORT XIAXUE AND HER PETITION TO BAN AEROSOL FOAM SPRAYS!

Someone, I didn't get a view who, but some fucker thought it was fun to spray those stinky white stuff at random people. I got sprayed on my hair, my left cheek, my shoulder and MY HANG TEN TOP!!!!! Damn you! Damn damn damn you!!!

I was so thankful that I had Cecilia with me. There were a gazillion foreign workers present and she never failed to remind me to hold on tight to my belongings, keep a distance away from them and make sure their hands do not wonder to "places".

Walking to Boat Quay from the esplanade was tedious! And when we were already at Parliament House, Faris called and told me that he was on his way from The Oriental to the Esplande. -_-"

You guessed it. THE 3 OF US WALKED BACK TO WHERE WE WERE PREVIOUSLY!

Met up with Baby Boy and who should we run into? BANI!! Who's that? Another of my colleague lah.

Had dinner (they ate, not me) at some Muslim shop that sold Western cuisines at ridiculous prices for ridiculously small portions. Cecilia ordered Fish&Chips, but the two pieces of fish were so minute, I wondered what kind of fish they used. Tsk tsk... Baby ordered Chicken chop for a freaky 8 bucks. Afterwhich, he had to spend another $4 on eye-mo because aerosol foam sprays got into his eyes.

BAN THOSE SPRAY THINGS RIGHT THIS INSTANT!

Walked Baby back to The Oriental and Cecilia and I went to some ulu corner to wait for a cab. Pffft... 3 cabs got stolen! Hate it when that happens. You've been flagging for a taxi when some idiot goes further up the street and gets the taxi because you're further behind. Sickening!!

Never mind; at least I only had to wait a mere 10 minutes. Easy lah! Reached home around 4 in the morning but was only able to sleep after 6!!

Clara knows why. And bitch, you better not be laughing while reading this ok!! IT IS SOOO NOT LAUGHABLE!

Sunday, January 01, 2006

HAPPY 2006!!!

First and foremost, thank you to all those lovely people who sent me those heart-warming sms-es. I read it and I felt so loved; people actually remember me! But sorry guys, I couldn't reply because I was at work when those messages reached my inbox and Johan was around so I couldn't eat snake.

Rest assured, all messages have been read, saved and etched in my head. My darling bitch Clara, my fellow ex-elisians, my cousins and girlfriends from EV, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! *muacks*

Ok, there wasn't a party for New Years eve at Billy Bombers, so no pictures. And no pictures = no nice entry.

But I'm tired at the moment. I promise to give you all a full account on how I spent New Years eve, who I spent it with and how time past by. It's 4am ok!!! And I just reached home... so lemme sleep first then I'll give you all a nice story later today can?

Surely can one lah.

I'm off to dreamland now. Happy 4 hours & God bless!
ps: Faris baby, love ya loads!!! Know why? Cos you rock my world!