Friday, June 23, 2006

BUSY BUSY DAYS!

I am so full of worry for my exams, I can barely think straight. I promised Dad that I'll do well since he's forking out cash by the truckload to pay for my education, I also promised him that I'm able to juggle both work and studies. So far, I have been able to balance both sides... but sometimes, I really feel like quitting school and become a full-timer with Billy Bombers.

Work is fun! My colleagues treat me well and I have learned alot of stuffs eversince I joined the crew way back in November 2005. It's been 7 outrageous months as a waitress and trust me, I'd never give up those times for anything else this dreadful world has to offer.

Recently, my bitches celebrated my (early) birthday with me at Sentosa. Yeaps, another year older... another year without a companion. I guess, it's been two years since I last had someone to cuddle against. Bah! It shall remain that way.

I have been spending quite alot of time with Salmon as well... And during the Spain vs Tunisia game, we were sms-ing each other like crazy during the first half! He was going on and on about how Spain would lose and how they were down on luck, whereas I grumbled about the referee being biased against the spainiards and that their defence was horrendous.

Final score: Spain 3-1 Tunisia

HAHAHAHAHAHA! Obviously, I got the last laugh.

I wonder what life would be like without him and his bogus laughter. Thinking about it just spoils my mood; knowing that he'll be gone for that period. I can't spend Christmas with him. WILL WE EVEN BE IN CONTACT AFTER HE RETURNS HOME? I don't know and I don't wanna think about the negative outcome of things. All I hope is for him to be happy and successful.

Humans are strange little beings. If I had ran into Salmon on the streets, I'd pass him off like any random guy. But then I got to know him through work and this happens. Oh bother... it happens everytime I gotta study for a major exam. I do get a wee bit distracted, but I do manage to pull myself together after a few days of slacking; which results in my performance in school being mediocre. Trust me, it SUCKS.

"Now in the bus alone... sian ah! Salmon, salmon, salmon!"

"Oh, u're in bus70? Why dun take 133? Walk nearer mah... sal ur head lahh!"


Those are nothing but memories now. At that point of time, there was something for me to hope for, to look forward to. That is, until he dropped the bomb on me before his birthday. Argh! Horrible night, I remember. Frickin' unforgettable yet horrible.

I'm trying my best to get him off my mind... and it's not easy. I want to put an end to it all... but I can't seem to let go of what blossomed and died between us. Is there another guy out there similar to him? Anyone else more compatible with me?? But the one big question I have in my head is; "When he's away, will he think of me as much as I know I'll think of him?"

God, save my soul and take it all away! For the time being, I'd like to live in a world where emotions do not exist (again!). It's the only way I'll ever get over him; if I lock all my feelings up and remain numb.

So it's settled then...

Sunday, June 18, 2006

What a day/night!

I had filming at Siti's just yesterday with my sub-group. The first half of it all was really enjoyable. We shot Shidah's scene at the lift lobby and those damned aircrafts kept hovering around Hougang so yeah, there were TONNES of bloopers for that scene.

I think it was an hour and a half later, we all felt peckish so the team decided to dial for pizzas! Jue and I were craving for chicken... so KFC it was for us! Woots! Yum... cheese fries, whipped potato and extra succulent chicken pieces!

Then I had my scene to shoot. Hahaha! Two takes were all I needed. But I realised how strange I look... oh no, not "strange". More like FUGLY!

As you all should be able to tell, I was having one hell of a fun time completing this ICA of module 1027. That is, until that two foreign girls started giving me trouble and making life so fucking difficult to live!

Here's the scoop; I sent them an sms, telling them to take bus 72 to Siti's place immediately after their class. THEY REPLIED TO TELL ME THEY UNDERSTOOD WHAT I SAID! So as I was busy with something on Miss Siti's laptop, that fucking CK told me that both she and M were at Yio Chu Kang station, not knowing where to go.

Fine. They're not local... they're unfamiliar with the routes here. Ok, I called them to give 'em directions and specifically indicated that I needed them to send me a note once they board the bus so I know when I should go downstairs to wait for them.

CK then sent me a note a few seconds after hanging to tell me that they were waiting for the bus.

GREAT! I flared up and replied, "SMS ME WHEN U BOARD!".

Here's their reply to me while they were on bus 72, "We are now on the board".

I went downstairs with Nad to wait for them. Two of bus 72 went pass and we couldn't see those two blur cocks onboard either one of those buses. I had no choice but to call M and ask her for the bus' license plate number.

"M, I need you to tell me the license plate number of the bus"

"Huh.. err... ah... what?"

"LICENSE PLATE NUMBER! Look at where the driver is sitting. What is the license plate number?"

"Eeehhhh... erm... can you send me a message? I dunno... dunno"

"JUST LOOK AT THE DRIVER'S AREA! wHAT IS THE NUMBER THERE??!!!"

"Huh? Err..."

*I pass the phone to Nad*

"Ok, M, can you tell me what's the license plate number? You look at the driver's seat there... can you see some numbers?"

"Errr.... AMK...."

"Kim, license plate got AMK one ah?"

"WHAT THE FUCK?! M!!!! LOOK ON TOP OF THE DRIVER'S SEAT! TELL ME THE LICENSE PLATE NUMBER NOW!!!!!"

"Oh!!! Err... hehe... 3823Z"


Dad, can you please send me on a permanent vacation?! Fucking irritating sia! I ask ONE question and it takes her ten minutes to give me a DECENT ANSWER! And in the process of getting the answer hor, I also lost count of how many "err" "huh" "Ah" she frickin' said. Still can ask me to send her a sms cos she "cannot hear" me leh! Send you sms, you take forever to reply, by the time I receive the license plate number from you, the bus already reach Tampines.

And here's the finale of the day! The cherry on top of a really lovely sundae! The moment CK and M entered Siti's room, there was this fucking strong stench which I sorta figured could come from a corpse.

There I was, occupying myself with the laptop while M changed into her nurse uniform and then smell just took my breath away (literally!). I swear, I could've fainted on the spot! God knows where the stench was coming from!!

"OMG!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL?! NAD, CAN SMELL IT OR NOT?"

Nad: "yah"

CK: "Erm, I wear the sport shoes. Sorrey ah..."

Noticed how I spelt "sorry" as "sorrey"? Well, that's how CK pronounces it. Sorrey, sorrey, sorrey, sorrey.... Say SOR-RAY!

I told Shidah about it all. Even that minah also cannot believe how a pair of feet could stink up a room to such an extent! And to think the thought of a corpse even appeared in my mind... YES! IT WAS THAT BAD!


After the crew left (crew? Hahaha!), Clara, Siti and I left for Hougang point for dinner. But then again, you can't really call it dinner since all I had was Mango Ice (without milk!) and Siti just settled for Red Ruby with sago. It was that tall bitch who was busy munching fishballs, mushrooms, crab sticks, meatballs and noodles. Delicious eh? Mouth watering already not?

We spent the night chatting away in the alfresco of the kopitiam. Talked about our families, our current school/work life, our doubts, our fears (Miss Siti got many many fears!)... it felt like a scene out of Sweet Valley whereby all the high schoolers lived near one another in a district and they meet up really frequently to chill out or just to have a drink. I am so thankful for having those two ladies live so near me; one in Hougang and another in Jalan Kayu. Near, near, near!

Even after we each went our separate ways, we were on the phone till 2am in the morning! Those two idiots tried to drown me with their "tsunami" and the "emergency call". Is that what those two acts are called??? Maybe I should come up with my own wake up call.

Hey, bitches! See you two at Sentosa tomorrow!

Friday, June 16, 2006

The ugly side of things

I absolutely dislike people who pretend to be something they're not. I'm the REAL FAN!

Anyway, I had a fantabulous time yesterday with Claudia (in the afternoon), Nicky and Kelly (at night).

The day started off with Cloudy and I meeting at Lido for a movie; Amanda Bynes' "She's the man". GREAT movie, if you ask me. I love the scene whereby Duke and Viola where training on the pitch together as a couple. SO SWEET!! (if only I were that lucky when it comes to matters of the heart..)

After salivating over Duke's sexy footballer legs and well-chiselled face, we headed off for Billy Bombers Bugis Junction cause Cloudy was yearning for a banana milkshake. And I, an american brownie.

Both of us ended up having a Club Sandwich as well! Omg, my tummy has never been that huge and I never found it so hard to walk from Table 8 to the restroom before!! Oh yah, remember back when I was still working in BJ, I sorta "invented" a coconut coke?? MAG ACTUALLY BOUGHT THE COCONUT ESSENCE!!! While I was half-way through my sandwich, Gen, Nicky and Kris gave me and glass of coke and asked me to taste it.

Coke only mah.. so drink lor.

OH-MY-FUCKING-SWEET-COCONUT-GOODNESS! That coconut coke tasted like some liquified version of Nasi Lemak! So horrible, terrigible and vegetable! Ugh~!

Then Nicky told me that she would be meeting Kelly later on at about 5pm for a movie; ask if I wanted to join them. Huh... two movies in one day??? Aiyah, my love for those two girls would flood the atlantic ocean... joining them doesn't need second thoughts.

So when Nicky was changing; ready to punch out, I went to the toilet and then had a short chat with Ziqi. Nicky stood at the cashier, looked over at my table, saw it empty AND PRESUMED THAT I LEFT!!! She and Kelly then went to buy movie tickets WITHOUT ME!!

So no choice, I had to go back to BB and when Joe saw me, he went, "What are you doing back here? Still hungry ah?"

"No lah... Nicky went for a movie. Now I waiting for her to finish her show"

"I thought you just had a movie before you came?"

"Yah. Now is Nicky's turn."

"Wah... excuse me for saying this ah, but you guys are weird man! What sort of planning is this?"

Cloudy and I just laughed it off and I spent the next two hours sitting at the bar-top, chatting with Mag, Carol and Bel.

After what seemed like FOREVER, that two girls finally called me and asked me to meet them at Watson's. We then roamed the streets of Bugis, walking from Seiyu to Bugis Village then to OG and from there, we walked back to Seiyu where I bought a white top from Topshop. BERRY BERRY CHEAP LEH!!! $19 only!!!

Then we went for a drink at Burger King and I SAW LEANDRA! Fucking ugly slut! Walking around in a white tube top, talking on her handphone like as though she's somekinda big shot. Hello, it's ONLY Singapore Idol. You wanna know what's big shot? Read this: American Idol, World Idol, America's Next top model, Supermodel of the world, Miss World, Miss Universe etc.

Singapore Idol? HAHAHAHA! Sorry for not being loyal to the locals but, I have serious doubts over whether our "idols" are even vocally talented in the first place.

So anyway, the three of us started talking about some people. Three guys to be specific. I don't think it's convenient for me to type it all out here so I think it's better that I don't elaborate on the topics any further and as always, NO NAMES AVAILABLE.

Last night, or was it early this morning (at 12 am), Kelly told me one of the most shocking incidents ever. It was all about Salmon and him being very unpopular among the crew.

Sal, WHAT HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO?!! Why did you have to go to such an extent and damage your reputation?! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BACKSTAB MY EX-COLLEAUE?! What have you become... Who are you now...

I spilled it all to my bitches later on; telling them about what he did and how much people hated him now. Siti's first words were, "Err... ok, that doesn't sound like the Salmon we talked about."

True... it doesn't sound like the Salmon I know. It doesn't sound like the Salmon whom I allowed myself to fall for. I fell for the Salmon who cared for his colleagues, gave me a sense of security and made me feel important. Who's this stranger Kelly and Nicky told me about last night?

Sal, I know this will never happen... but if you could only look me in the eye and tell me that it wasn't you who did all those stuff, I would definately believe you. I can't bring myself to portray you in such negative light... I just can't! Not after all that we've been through and all that you've done for me. Just tell me it wasn't you who backstabbed my ex-colleague and I will believe you instantly.

I am living in an empty world right now. Firstly, you're leaving me and then you become this horrible person whom I never knew existed within you! Are you aware of all the things I've done to console myself in your absence? Do you know how much I treasure our pictures at Sentosa? Do you even know that I saved all your messages because those precious words are specially written from you to me?! I read them to remind myself of the times we've gone out together, the conversations we've had and the special moments shared.

Why did you have to ruin your image this way? Tell me, Salmon... WHY?!

Monday, June 12, 2006

Freedom to express

I shouldn't be doing this because I promised Clara and Siti that I'd move on, but I can't help it. The load is too much to carry and I need to let it all out. That's the good thing about having an unknown blog; nobody is able to read what you're about to write and therefore, you're free of judgement.

Bitches, you two know for a fact that Sal is not a bad guy. Remember all the times I've told you about how he treats me? If he were a "bastard" or a "jerk", would he go to the extent of being such a gentlemen?

He might have chosen his studies over me, but have you asked yourself why he did that?

If it was me, I would've gone for my education as well. He's not being selfish... he just can't afford to love. At least not now when he's being offered such a chance to excel. I honestly don't expect him to give up this opportunity for me or any other girl. From what I know, he went through a great deal to finally snag himself a vacancy.

After what he told Clara, he has proven to me that he's not a bad person. It's all really simple; he doesn't want to be committed to a long-distance relationship because he's aware that it ain't easy and both parties might get hurt in the process. I guess, he's just not willing to risk our friendship.

I am sad that things didn't turn out the way I wanted it to, but then again, it might be better to have him as a friend. Boyfriends come and go like how fresh green leaves grow on a branch and fall off a few months later. Friendship, on the other hand, lasts forever. The things he's done for me, the outings we've had, the late-night suppers, the 3 day sms marathon...

I wouldn't trade those times/things for anything else the world has to offer.

Bitches, thank you. Sal, good luck.

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Well, what can I say?
I'm a friend to BOTH people and animals.


Couldn't find the white tigers, so I had to make do with these deers instead (actually, until now, I'm still unclear about whether those are deers or rams).


In case you're wondering, my shirt says, "What is a nice girl like me doing in a place like this"

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Huge thanks to the world's best bitches who sent me these sms-es!

"I think the saddest part when you've lost someone is actually not the deceased but the people whom the deceased are leaving behind. To move and live on without the person, it is bravery indeed..."

-Siti-


"Bitches, the high tide will be over. If you lost something, or you feel that you lost something, it's okay to dwell on it. But the saddest thing is to sit at the same spot to dwell and never move on. Memories were once built, you have every right to destroy them. But for me, I chose to let it stay. Cause those memories remind me of what I went through and they will make you grow stronger with any setback taken. Life's unpredictable. You will never know what's gonna happen. Look at the bright side and I believe miracles do happen cause you guys have been my miracle. Kim, the hardest part of holding on is letting go.

-Clara-

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

It's called REPETITION

I apologise to my friends/readers who would go to moiselle-bombastic.blogspot and find it empty except for the message I left behind, telling them that I have stopped blogging.

It's a lie.

I will never stop blogging. I can never stop blogging. But then again, I need time away from the eyes of the public so as to let my emotional wounds heal. A very painful process, I might say. Though I'm relatively "experienced" in getting rejected, I'm not very good in trying to get back onto my feet.

Sal, I so wanna hate you. I so wanna look you in the eye and tell you that you are the biggest jerk around. I despise you, detest you and I wish I've never met you.

Still, I can't bring myself to do all those hurtful stuffs to you.

You were the one who constantly taught me how to be strong. It was you who stood up for me. And we have all the times whereby you'd sms me; asking if I'm safely at home, how was I coping with school, has my sun-burn healed etc.

I have asked myself this question over and over again; how often does a girl come across a guy who's as mature, caring and gentlemenly as you?

The answer: SELDOM!

With you around, I'm always the first one boarding/alighting the bus, going up the escalator, entering a theatre and stepping into a store.

Why on earth did I allow myself to fall for you?

I don't know. Could be because you treated me like how every woman would want to be treated, you always looked out for me by holding my hand while jay-walking/ turning towards me every now and then to check on me or even because.... well... you're just YOU. And you're unlike any other guy I've come across (which makes you relatively SPECIAL).

All I wanted to know is how you felt towards me. When your answer finally reached my ears, you retreated and decided to go far away from me.

Haha! Maybe it's just not meant to be.

Judo master blows Salmon a kiss and waves goodbye as he boards a plane. She is crying deep down within; though not showing it.