You've been Moonstrucked- by Miss Misanthrope

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Clowns are FUNNY!!

Don't you agree with me on that? They do the craziest things and make others laugh till the jellies from their eyeballs turn dry and their abdomens contract so much, their guts get pushed out through their nostrils. THANKFULLY, I have yet to experience that because I have never met a real clown; until yesterday when I tagged along with Clarence (Clara & Terence. why I chose to merge their names? the full story later!) to Pasir Ris Library for their show.

Well, you see, their show is actually for little kiddies aged between 6-12 (correct not?) and ya'll know how much children enjoy laughing at the stupidity of clowns eh? So not only was this clown late by 15 minutes, she chose to make her presence known with pants that were UNZIPPED. Oh yeah, I was the camera-woman for the day and I quietly zoomed in on her crotch while she was reading from her script.

Gag!!!

Reporting to the agreed venue late and coming in all shabbily dressed? Totally irresponsible and unprofessional. What's up with making your zip point out horizontally man? Girls with with boobs up there and a rod down there is just not right. Not to mention, the little girls who were present for the skit could get the wrong idea about puberty! Just try and visualise Carmen Electra in her Baywatch swimsuit and there's something sticking out from both her upper and lower body.......

The poor kids who had to endure with her wardrobe malfunction

Wait a minute; something about this picture tells me that the kids knew a "boob-penis combo" wasn't right. They seem to be pointing at Miss Clown to tell her something..... but the 2 big children on the left seem to be captivated by her anatomically wrong body structure. Erm, guys, what colour panties was she wearing again??

Sigh, the poor dears...

Alright, alright... enough about the show and the failure clown. We shall now move on to the latest couple to be engaged with GUCCI RINGS!! Genuine one somemore... I'm so gonna rob them while their busy making out on their wedding night! Pui!

Behold, the classic, old-school engagement ring shot (and the birth of Clarence)

Their colour of their skin very matching right?! But it's the pair of rings that I'm interested in. Oh, and did I mention, Tiffany & Co. is so overrated. EVERYONE HAS ONE. Now, who can afford a pair of Gucci rings eh? Not many I suppose. *evil laughter* I'm so gonna get my hands on those rings... die do must get them!

And I dunno what's wrong with this couple. They're... they're just weird lah! Chinese New Year that time come my place and slow dance in front of the TV.

AND THAT GROOM-TO-BE IS JEALOUS OF ME!!! Why? Because he never see the bride-to-be cheerlead before. And he wasn't there when she went on stage to sumpah to be a good prefect and serve the school well (whether she kept to that oath is another story ah). Then also, he didn't get to witness how his future wife crawled in the baby pool while the other swimmers swam from one end to the other.

Nanny-nanny-poo-poo! I saw EVERYTHING!!!

His jealous grew so strong, he called off the hen-party!! And in the end, you know where Clara and I went to party??

This is the new building. Personally, I think it sucks... too colourful and ordinary looking. Where's the old building with pyramid roofs and the one-of-a-kind canteen? Stupid new building!

Then hor, then hor, then hor!!!! At their engagement party right, that dumb dumb groom purposely take blur shots of me and Licious!!! Kiam pah or not?!

MUCH BETTER!

He only decided to steady his hands when I placed a steak knife by his throat and threatened to make him run down Orchard Road in a bikini like how Fiona, Felicia and Jeanette did.

Okays, that's all for now, I guess. Gotta go prepare my speech for their wedding. I'M THE MASTER OF CEREMONY LEH!! And they are gonna pay me six-figure sum just for talking a whole lot of crap on stage. Woot! My pockets are gonna be fat, fat, fat!

Toodles!

Shadow stepped, body touched, soul crashed at 1:15 pm.